Amrita Party dissolves for 2022

 

After making only a token effort thus far on the 2022 campaign trail, the Amrita Party has announced its permanent dissolution and will not be seeking seats in the 52^nd Congress. The Party released a communiqué full of COVID-19 cliché phrases such as “out of an abundance of caution”, “we’re all in this together” and “it is with a heavy heart that the Amrita Party is closing operations permanently”. Holding 78 seats, the Amrita Party was the second-largest caucus in the 51^st Congress, behind only the Social Democrats’ 96 seats.

The Amrita Party was established in 2001 as the voice of Amma’s Patrienish devotees with Amma as House leader in Congress, representing the Precinct of Arboria. The party was generally liberal-progressive, reflecting the political views of the vast majority of Amma’s western devotees in the macro-world (notwithstanding that conservatives, Republicans, and even die-hard supporters of Donald Trump go for Amma’s darshan too!). During its twenty years, the Amrita Party can boast of some major achievements in Patria that will continue the party’s legacy in 2022 and beyond:

• Inclusion of Amma's teachings and bhajans (devotional songs) in the curriculum of many of Patria's elementary schools.
• Opening of a branch of the Amrita Institute of Medical Sciences (AIMS) hospital in Patria.
• Establishment of a campus of the Amrita University in Patria.
• Establishment of a permanent Amma ashram in Patria, in Karunanagar, Caesarea, easily accessible via the Caesarea Coast Line of the Castoropolis and Caesarea Railways (CCR).
• Addition of Amrita Television to all basic cable TV services in Patria.

Where does the Amrita Party’s demise leave the 78 members of the caucus? They will continue to hold their seats in Congress until their terms expire on June 30, 2022. Some will sit as independents for the remaining six months of the 51^st Congress term of office, while others will call themselves IAM – Independent Amrita Members – and hope for enough write-in votes or for the Amrita Party to remain printed on their precinct’s ballot so that they have a puncher’s chance of retaining a seat in the 52^nd Congress. But they shouldn’t count on many write-in votes. Most of the voters/devotees who cast ballots for Amrita in 2018 will gravitate to the Chakra Party, Greens or Social Democrats. But don’t assume that all Amrita voters are liberal, leftist or progressive (see reference to conservatives also going for Amma’s darshan). A fair number of Amrita voters will go for the SRM in 2022. 

The fact that Amma could not set foot outside her ashram in Kerala or hug her millions of devotees, let alone visit Patria because of COVID-19 is a convenient whipping boy for the Amrita Party’s demise. On the right-wing talk stations such as POKX-648, SRM’ers and National Unionists were gloating that Amrita had run its course, is now a spent force and the Amma gravy train (or hugging train) has come to a halt.

Not exactly the message from Amma that Patria hoped to hear.

Visit Patria’s capital city – where Delta and Omicron are streets!

 COVID-19 travel restrictions got you down? Do you want to visit someplace where you don’t have to wear masks indoors, don’t have to be tested or quarantined on arrival, and don’t have to produce a vaccine passport along with your regular passport? Someplace where bars, restaurants and other indoor gathering places are not subject to capacity limits and other restrictions? Consider a visit to Patria! The following visitor’s guide to Castoropolis is based on one of Patria’s old long-defunct Geocities web pages dating from the Clinton administration.

 Patria's capital city and its largest city, Castoropolis -- known in Sanskrit as Kashipura -- contains features of other capital cities planned and built from scratch in the modern era, such as Washington, Brasilia, Canberra, and New Delhi - particularly in its radial street layout in which the Capitol is the central hub, wide boulevards and diagonal connecting streets, and central green space or "Common". It is centered on the Island of Castoropolis, a nearly round island in the St. Joseph River - which has since been officially renamed Naya Ganga or New Ganges.  In the years following the Dharmic Revolution of 1989-90 many Anglo-sounding names of places and streets in Patria have been Sanskritized. But just as in India, where English street names in New Delhi and Bombay have been replaced by Hindi or Sanskrit names and even the name of Bombay has been changed to Mumbai, the new names have generally failed to catch on despite the best efforts of the government. In the text that follows, all official Sanskrit re-namings are indicated in [square brackets].

 Orientation:

Castoropolis was established as Patria's permanent capital city by act of the First Congressus Patriaë in 1818, only a few months after Independence, while Congress met in the temporary capital of Hammond, Caesarea. In the 1820s the new city was planned and built with obvious inspiration from the plan of Washington, DC designed by Pierre L'Enfant.  The Federal District of Castoropolis, whose boundaries are co-extensive with the city itself, is entirely surrounded by several cities, towns, and suburban sprawl in the Precinct of Caesarea.  The original area of the Federal District of Castoropolis consisted only of the Island of Castoropolis.  By the turn of the 20th century the city's built-up areas had expanded beyond the limits of the island and so in 1917 an act of the 25th Congress incorporated into the Federal District several towns and villages in the Precinct of Caesarea on the east side of the Naya Ganga. One town, Crozier Heights, fought the annexation and remains part of Caesarea. Crozier Heights is an upper-class enclave, like Toronto's Forest Hill or Montreal's Westmount, home to much of Patria's Jewish community.

The Capitol building, which houses the Congressus Patriaë, is the central focus of Castoropolis. Located only a few metres east of the geographic centre of the Island of Castoropolis, its dome and rotunda are very similar in appearance to the United States Capitol.  Extending west from the Capitol is Castoropolis Common [Bhavani Bagh], a large central park. In fact, Castoropolis Common is not unlike New York City's Central Park, offering a large open field for concerts, numerous recreational facilities, wooded areas, and secluded spots for doing yoga. In the 1970s and 80s the Common served as a hangout for drug dealers, muggers, rapists, homeless bums and other assorted sleaze, and travelers were advised to visit during daylight hours only, but it has since been cleaned up, thanks in part to the Federal District government that was led by the law-and-order National Union in the 1990s and early 2000s. A gridiron pattern of residential streets is superimposed on the radial/diagonal plan.  Streets running east and west are numbered (beginning with First Street, one block north and south of the Capitol and the baseline streets: Crozier St. East [Shankaracharya Marg] and Justice St [Dasharath Marg]), while streets running north and south - with the exception of four major arteries - have Greek letters (beginning with Alpha Street one block east and west of the Capitol and the baseline street: Schaefer St [Shakti Marg]), continuing until Omega Street. The island is divided into four quadrants, relative to the Capitol: North West, North East, South West and South East, similar to Washington, DC. Thus there may be as many as four intersections of , for example, Sixth and Gamma Streets:  NW, NE, SW,  and SE.

Downtown area

The map above details the central business district at the western end of the Common. St. Joseph [Radha-Krishna] Station handles mainly local commuter trains; most inter-city rail traffic runs out of Union [Mahasabha] Station, a neo-Gothic rockpile (à la Bombay's Victoria Terminus) located at 4th and Vermont [Vaikuntha Marg] NW.  Hector [Hanuman] St. was once the capital's truly slimy side, in the last century teemng with hookers, pimps and drug dealers.  The Hector Hotel, at Hector and 4th St. SW, used to be a notorious whore-house before it was renovated and became a guest house for visiting swamis, swaminis, sadhus and sadhvis (Hindu holy men and women). If you find a couple of churches but don't see any Hindu temples marked on this map, there's a reason for it: this map dates from 1976, long before the Dharmic Revolution.

Central/midtown area

The map above details the eastern end of the Common and the many government buildings surrounding the Capitol at the centre of the Island of Castoropolis.  Many of the government buildings, such as the Treasury Dept., Post Office Department and Library of Congress, are massive monuments of Art Deco kitsch, built in the 1930s as make-work projects during the  Depression. Both the U.S. and Russian Embassies are conveniently located a few blocks east of the Capitol. The Canadian Embassy is at 200 Theta St. NW.  Crozier St. East [Poorva Shankaracharya Marg], a wide boulevard extending east from the Capitol to the former Executive Mansion (now Shanti Mandir, a Hindu temple) on the eastern end of the Island, is the main ceremonial parade route for Inaugural parades, Rathyatra (the annual Parade of Chariots) and other Hindu ceremonial processions.

Public Transit

Castoropolis Metro (Subway) 
The capital's first subway line was opened in 1918 as a special project to mark Patria's centennial year. The system has grown over the past 100-plus years to four lines and over 150 stations.

Castoropolis and Caesarea Railways
Castoropolis and Caesarea Railways (CCR) provide suburban commuter rail service throughout the greater Castoropolis region, between downtown Castoropolis and Hammond (the capital of Caesarea) and even into the neighboring Precinct of Antioch, using EMU and DMU trainsets, as well as bi-level electric locomotive-hauled trains.

Castoropolis Transit (CT) buses serve all areas of the Federal District and the surrounding cities in Caesarea. Most CT bus routes provide direct connections with the subway. Above, a Canadian-built General Motors "New Look" bus, #5708, lays over at the end of Route 1, Adelphi-Philidor in 2002. The New Looks (also known as "Fishbowls") have since been retired.

Local print and broadcast media (Don’t forget to bring your radio!)

 AM Radio stations: On Nov. 23, 1978 AM radio stations in Patria, as in many other countries of the world (except in the Americas) shifted from 10 kHz to 9 kHz spacing. The old 10 kHz frequency is indicated in square brackets.

PCRC, 531 kHz (ethnic, variety) [530]
PCGE, 595 kHz (Hindu) [590]
POKX, 648 kHz (right-wing talk) [650] (formerly Patria's major top 40 rocker)
PHTN, 792 kHz (Ramrajyavani-II) [790]
PMC, 846 kHz (news, talk, information) [850]
PRCC, 918 kHz (Ramrajyavani-I) [920]
PTE, 1017 kHz (Hindu) [1020]
PTCN, 1071 kHz (Ramrajyavani-III) [1070]
PMBC, 1152 kHz (all sports) [1150]
PHN, 1251 kHz (liberal-left talk) [1250]
PVOG, 1350 kHz (Christian, brokered ethnic) [1350]
PKBY, 1404 kHz (Nostalgia/MoYL) [1400]
PECR, 1512 kHz (business news) [1520]
PGBS, 1557 kHz (ethnic) [1560]

FM Radio stations:
PHUP, 88.1 MHz (educational/public, Hindu University of Patria)
PNIT, 88.9 MHz (educational/public, Patrienish National Institute of Technology)
PUC, 89.7 MHz (educational/public, University of Castoropolis)
PCCC, 90.5 MHz (educational/public, City College of Castoropolis)
PGBS-FM, 91.3 MHz (adult contemporary)
PMC-FM, 92.5 MHz (classical, jazz)
PREM, 94.9 MHz (new age)
POKQ, 96.1 MHz (hot hits)
PRCC-FM, 99.1 MHz (Ramrajyavani-IV)
PPIX, 103.7 MHz (rap, dance, hip hop)
PMBC-FM, 104.9 MHz (C&W)
PCGE-FM, 106.7 MHz (classic rock)
PRKO, 107.9 MHz (oldies)

Ramrajyavani-I : popular music, news, information, documentaries, English/Patrienish; Ramrajyavani-II: Hindu devotional music, Sanskrit; Ramrajyavani-III: all-news; Ramrajyavani-IV: classical music, drama, poetry, arts.

Television stations (analog, over-the-air):

PRCT, channel 2 (Doordarshan-I); PMC-TV, channel 5; PGBS-TV, channel 12; PLIS, channel 15; PCET, channel 46 (public broadacsting); PQAL, channel 57 (Doordarshan-II).

Doordarshan I: news, sports, entertainment.  Doordarshan-II: Hindu devotional channel.  U.S. cable channels such as CNN and MTV are widely available in Patria.

Daily newspapers: The Akashic Record, (pro-Hindu), Castoropolis Chronicles (left-wing paper of record, cf. New York Times or Washington Post), The Spectrum (right-wing tabloid, cf. Toronto Sun or New York Post), Ramrajya Dharmika Patrika (Sanskrit), Novítæ Dínaë (Patrienish).

Amrita Party missing in action on Campaign 2022 trail

 As the race for Patria's 52nd Congress heats up, amid the bevy of campaign posters and broadcast ads from the Social Democrats, SRM, Chakra Party, National Union, Green Party, Jungle Party, etc., the Amrita Party has been conspicuously absent from the Campaign 2022 trail. There are rumors that the Amrita Party will re-brand, re-name itself or even dissolve completely as due to COVID-19 the Party's namesake is unable to travel outside India or even set foot outside her hometown ashram in Kerala. Holding 78 seats, the Amrita Party is the second-largest caucus in the 51st Congress. If the party were to disappear, that would leave a lot of seats up for grabs and a lot of Amma devotees scrambling to find another party. Some will be attracted to the SRM's call for renewed Hindu Dharma. Others will find the Chakra Party's emphasis on government through yoga and meditation more to their liking. Some sitting Amrita Party members might try to run as independents, depending on whether their home Precinct allows write-in votes on the 2022 ballot.

2010 Amrita Party campaign poster. Will they campaign at all in 2022?

Notwithstanding Patria's Hindu identity in the three-plus decades since the Dharmic Revolution, Christmas in Patria is a public and government holiday. Patria tries as much as possible to avoid the excess over-commercialism and keep Christ in Christmas (old slogan "We keep Krishna in Janmashtami, you can keep Christ in Christmas"). Patria Post's 2021 Christmas stamp features original artwork by Georgetown, ON artist Eric "Magoo" Kohlfurst.

Neither left nor right: minor and fringe parties hold Patria’s balance of power

Thanks to proportional representation, minor parties play a key role in Patria and a vote for one of the pint-size parties is almost never a wasted vote. A coalition government, whether led by the Social Democrats, SRM or even the Chakra Party, usually can’t be cobbled together without the support of at least one such party. When a two-thirds majority is needed for ratification of many pieces of legislation, and even for the bills that can be passed with a simple 50% majority, one vote here and one vote there from a fringe or nutbar party can be crucial.

Patria’s Green Party and Libertarian party need no further explanation, as they share the policies and platforms with their macro-national Green and Libertarian counterparts.

The Lilith Party is a party of radical feminists, as hard-left as they come. Real “womyn” only, born with real vulvas and a full set of xx chromosomes. Trans women should steer clear of them. TERFs don’t come any more TERF than the Lilith Party.

There are a few single-issue parties, such as the Chastity Party and Family Values Party whose platforms are pretty much self-explanatory. They have no real raison d’être other than promoting socially conservative causes for the few who actually care about such things as advocating modest dress for women or banning public displays of affection. Local parties that appear on the ballot in only one precinct, such as the Pottsylvanian Alliance and Lazurian Independent Party, exist mainly to represent the interests of Pottsylvania and Lazuria respectively and try to get the precinct a better deal from Castoropolis. Like Canada, Patria’s version of federalism also includes transfer payments or economic subsidies from the federal government in order to help close the gap between the rich precincts such as Caesarea and the poorer ones such as Fredonia.

 

The fringiest of the fringe parties is arguably the Jungle Party, whose leader is the noted sports talk show host Jim Rome. The typical Jungle party voter is an unemployed or minimally employed 30-something male living in his parents’ basement, playing online games, eating leftovers or junk food, and with no girlfriend to speak of. But the party has apparently drawn men who might otherwise vote National Union.

Single-seat “parties of one” are not unusual in Patria’s Congress. In 2018 the Pottsylvanian Alliance, Lazurian Independent Party, Patriots’ Union of Nova Columbia (PUNC, usually pronounced as acronym), Peoples’ Party, Reconstruction Party and Popular Front of Caesarea took one seat each.