Campaign 2026: 53rd Congress election primer

 

Patria is flooded with SRM 2026 campaign posters!

Election time in Patria! Here's what you need to know:

Election Day: April 18, 2026 (Third Saturday in April; Patriot’s Day long weekend). Fredonia votes one week early, on April 11.

Inauguration Day: June 30, 2026

What’s at stake: 333 seats in Patria’s Fifty Third Congress (LIII Con. Pat.), elections for Precinct legislatures and local city, county or demi-precinct councils in some of Patria’s 13 Precincts and the Federal District of Castoropolis (FDC). There is also an upper house in Patria, like the US and Canadian Senate or UK House of Lords, but its 57 members are selected by the Precinct legislatures, not by direct popular vote.

Three hundred thirty three seats, same as it has been since 1982. An effort to shrink the Congress to 315 (the number of seats from 1966 to 1982) or even 300 seats has apparently failed as of Oct. 10, 2025. The bill was introduced at the outset of the Fourth Session, but failed to make it out of the Elections Committee to be voted on by the full House.

Members of Congress are elected by proportional representation. In each precinct, lists of candidates are prepared by each party and seats are awarded in proportion to the percentage of votes received. In the Federal District of Castoropolis, Caesarea, Antioch and Haldimania, a mixed-member proportional format is used. One-third of the seats (district seats) are awarded by traditional US, Canadian and UK-style first past the post, the remainder are proportional from party lists.

Congressional apportionment per precinct:

Caesarea – 61 seats (20 district, 41 proportional)

FDC – 38 (13 district, 25 proportional)

Nova Columbia – 36

Lazuria – 27

Centralia – 25

Aeolia – 24

Arboria – 21

Antioch – 19 (6 district, 13 proportional)

Ambrosia – 17

Canardiere – 16

Mauretania – 15

Pottsylvania – 13

Haldimania – 12 (4 district, 8 proportional)

Fredonia – 9

Term of office: Four year term ending June 30, 2030.

Vote counting: paper ballots counted by hand. Early mail-in voting will be encouraged. There will also be advance polls to allow in-person voting prior to Election Day. Fredonia is traditionally the first precinct to vote and its vote count is released a few hours before the polls open on Election Day in the rest of Patria.

Follow on X/Twitter @Patria1818. Hashtags: #PatriaVotes2026 #53rdCongress

Patria is as far as it gets from the dishwater-dull, boring, uninspired US two-party system, and what is essentially a two-party Liberal-Conservative duopoly in Canada. Following are capsule descriptions of the parties contesting the 2026 election.

Social Democrats “Go Forward!” democratic socialists in the tradition of the NDP/CCF and Bernie Sanders. Populist/dissident left, not PC, little tolerance for snowflakes. Won plurality in 2018, allied with Amrita and Chakra parties. (Unofficial color: blue, cf. US Democratic Party)

SRM (Swadeshi Ramrajya Movement) “Bring the jobs home” “Patria first” Small-c conservative Hindu nationalist, economic protectionist. Partially inspired by India’s BJP. Once used to be leftist-progressive, when the party originated among hippie students in the late 1960s, and SRM used to stand for Spiritual Regeneration Movement. Although the “BRING IT HOME” slogan didn’t work for Pierre Poilievre, the SRM will be using it hard for 2026. (Unofficial color: saffron) 

Chakra Party “no gurus, just right” yoga/new age liberal. Unreconstructed 1990s new agers. Generally allied with Amrita and/or Social Democrats. (Unofficial color: teal) 

National Union “where a man belongs”, “big dogs, tough men” macho, populist law and order, obedience, respect for authority. Owning a big dog is a test of manhood. Cats are for pussies. In 2026 the NU will likely stick to strictly law and order issues, push for restoration of the death penalty, and not go after the cat owners and non-macho men. (Unofficial color: deep purple) 

Jungle Party “Have a take, don’t suck”, inspired by Jim Rome. Really a fringe party with no real platform. Silk Brah (failed candidate in Huntington Beach, CA) led the Jungle caucus in 2022. (Unofficial color: red, cf. US Republican Party as a lot of Jim Rome’s US clones, the late Trapper notwithstanding, would probably vote GOP.) 

Green Party, environmentalist, sustainable growth, same as in macro-world. (color, duhhhh, green) 

Libertarian Party, more freedom, less government, also same as in macro-world. (Unofficial color: grey/silver) 

Lilith Party, for biological women only, originally intended as the anti-National Union. Mostly made up of radical left feminists who love cats. Extremely TERF. Co-sponsored the SAAB (Sex Assigned At Birth) act along with the NU and SRM. An unlikely alliance is forming between the NU (who are also extremely trans-phobic) and Lilith: REAL MEN AND REAL WOMEN! NO TRANS! (unofficial color pink, to no one’s surprise) 

IAM Party: new for 2026, a possible resurrection of the Amrita Party that was dissolved in late 2021. Name of party would simply be IAM, not Independent Amrita Members. In Patrienish “I am” is literally “ími sím”. 

Minor parties: fringe groups and nutbars (Chastity Party, Family Values Party, Freedom Party, Patriots’ Union of Nova Columbia, etc.) that get in thanks to no votes being wasted under proportional representation. There are several parties that hold only a single seat in Congress. 

Hot-button campaign issues and slogans: 

Continuing the post-pandemic recovery. “Just move on” is not acceptable. Patria should say “never again”, i.e. no more over-reaction and government over-reach. IT WAS ONLY THE FUCKING FLU! Or a bad cold. Why is there not a COVID Nuremberg? Why is no one in the macro-world being held accountable for the spike in domestic violence, drug abuse, alcoholism, children’s learning deficits, bankruptcies, suicides and other collateral damage? 

PATRIA FIRST! No need to fear populism, whether from the right or left. 

TAKE BACK THE ECONOMY! Return the Patrienish Rupee to the gold standard. Patria says NO FIAT CURRENCY! NO GREAT RESET! 

Attempting to re-define or ret-con the legacy of the 43^rd Congress, after 40 years, along with attempting to rehabilitate the failed 41^st Congress. 

Four more years of Social Democrat populist/dissident left? If so, Patria says NO to cancel culture. NO to PC virtue signaling. YES to free speech and open debate. Patria may be leftist or socialist in economic policy but it rejects Cultural Marxism and is NOT WOKE! 

“BRING IT HOME!” – slogan of the SRM-led coalition of right-populist Hindu nationalists and Patria-Firsters in 2026. Social Democrats: “PROGRESS WITH A PURPOSE”. Chakra Party: “BRING IT TOGETHER!” National Union: “BIG DOGS! LAW AND ORDER!”

No to woke, no to AI as Congress adjourns

Patria is not on Trump's tariff list.

On the day that Patria Post issued a commemorative stamp in memory of Jimmy Carter (scroll down to end), the Third Session of Patria's 52nd Congress (3·LII 2024-25) adjourned for the Northern Hemisphere Summer recess, following the traditional Annual Message delivered by the Speaker of the House:

Om lalitambikayai namaha. Salutations to Devi who is the Divine Mother Lalita. With Her blessings, the Fifty Second Congress has served three-quarters of its term of office. 

As always, and as per tradition, the final act of the Third Session earlier today was the ratification of Patria’s fiscal 2026 budget. Along with the budget’s usual appropriations, as in several years past, for spending on infrastructure improvements or re-builds and day-to-day improvement of existing public transit service is a call for micronational free trade. In past years, Patria pursued policies of isolationism, protectionism and a so-called “wall of tariffs”. But as unpopular as globalism might be with the grass roots and non-elites, such positions are now virtually untenable. Free Trade agreements must be ratified between Patria and other micronations, along with the current free flow of goods and services between Patria and Canada. Due to the economies of scale (or should we say, lack of scale) and the lack of a manufacturing base in most micronations, requiring almost all consumer goods to be imported, there must be no tariffs between micronations. To no one’s surprise, Patria stands with Canada, not to mention the rest of the macro-world, in the tariff wars being waged by Donald Trump. 

As this Session adjourns, it seems necessary to remind Americans and Patrienish citizens alike that the most profound act of patriotism is not waving a flag or singing an anthem, but defending the constitutional order when it faces existential threat, as is now the case in Trump’s America. True patriotism is not “my country right or wrong”. It is not abstract love of country divorced from its foundational principles. It is not blind loyalty to the person or the party who currently holds power. It is certainly not the willingness to abandon constitutional principles in the name of partisan advantage or cultural grievance. True patriotism is the moral courage to stand for the democratic republic and its constitutional underpinnings even—especially—when doing so comes at personal cost such as the risk of arrest, deportation, or imprisonment without due process. 

Patria said it a year ago with the passage of the SAAB (Sex Assigned At Birth) Act and Patria will say it again today: women’s competitive sports, women’s change rooms and public restrooms in Patria are intended for biological females only. Patria may not agree with much of President Trump’s bluster and bombast, but he is absolutely correct, as is the UK’s Supreme Court, that there are only two genders, male and female. Those former men can take pills and hormones, they can seek surgery in order to give them fake breasts and fake vulvas, but most citizens of Patria will still see them for what they are: guys pretending to be girls. They can use female pronouns and call themselves by women’s names, but we will call them he, him and by their given names as stated on their birth certificates. No one in Patria should hate trans-women, only love real biological women and shout it loudly without fear of pushback from misguided wokesters and leftist totalitarians: you transpeople are not women, you will not play sports against real women, you will not share intimate and safe spaces with real women. 

Once again it is necessary to state the obvious: Patria is not a home for unelected elites and “we know what is best for you” petty tyrants who claim to be liberals or progressives. Know this: there is nothing liberal or progressive about these totalitarian elites. Patria must be a safe haven for the average Joe and Jane, for the real people who work hard and struggle from paycheck to paycheck if they are lucky enough to have a job that has not been outsourced, offshored, or replaced by AI, for the grass roots, for the non-woke and never-woke. Let us forever say NO to cancel culture, NO to the gatekeepers, NO to the thought police, and particularly NO to AI! 

To paraphrase George HW Bush: “Read my lips, no Artificial Intelligence!” As far as can be determined in the daily lives of most citizens of Patria, ChatGPT and other AI programs serve no practical or beneficial purpose, particularly on social media where AI has only caused fake news to proliferate alongside lame pop culture fads such as blister-packed action figures. Bogus AI-generated “photos” and artwork such as the so-called Ghibli images are worse than photoshopped fake pictures, which at least must be based on an actual photograph. AI-generated text, essays and the like tend to be stilted, uninspired cliché-riddled prose that comes out sounding like a middle-school kid’s book report. Indeed, for students from grade school to graduate school, AI has done more harm than good. Not only does AI not improve writing skills, it takes plagiarism to a whole new level and outsources critical thinking to a nameless, faceless server bot. Consequently, Patria will not use AI for any official purpose – particularly in the campaign for the Fifty-Third Congress that will begin to roll out in this inter-session summer recess and continue until Election Day on April 18, 2026. While it is impossible for Patria to ban the use of AI, those who make excessive and unnecessary use of it will be looked down on with derision and scorn, just as Patria disdains sidewalk cyclists, graffiti artists, dog owners who fail to stoop and scoop, let their pets run off-leash and do not acknowledge that many people dislike dogs or are scared of them, and of course the proliferation of young hipsters (or even older folks) with otherwise attractive bodies defaced by tacky, ugly tattoos. 

Under the power vested in me by the Constitution of Patria, I declare closed the Third Session of the 52^nd Congress, and call this Congress to re-assemble here on Monday, 15 September 2025, in order to open the Fourth Session of the 52^nd Congress. 

HUMAN INTELLIGENCE DISCLAIMER: the preceding message was prepared, edited and delivered without the use of ChatGPT or other AI tool.

Flags of the 13 Precincts and Federal District

Today is Flag Day in Patria. It was on January 25, 1973 that the 39th Congress ratified the Flag Act specifying the technical standards (proportions, official shades of red and blue) of Patria's simple tricolor flag that had been in use since 1818. But did you know that each Precinct has its own flag? Like Patria's national flag, they are all so simple that even a child can draw them!