Patria remembers Pete Seeger

Pete Seeger (1919-2014)

Patria paused to remember legendary folk singer and social activist Pete Seeger, who passed away on Jan. 27 at age 94. A generation of kids in Patria (and of course in the USA, Canada and many other macro-nations) grew up singing along with Seeger at school and summer camp and later graduated to protest songs against the Vietnam war. During the McCarthy Red Scare blacklist era, when Seeger's alleged Communist sympathies prevented him from getting radio airplay and major concert performances in the United States, he was welcomed in Patria. And it should be noted that Patria in the 1950s and early 1960s was not a socialist pinko worker's paradise but was dominated by the National Union, albeit a kinder, gentler, more centrist NU than the current version that is campaigning for the 50th Congress.

"This machine surrounds hate and forces it to surrender" was the slogan on Pete Seeger's banjo. (Amma should write it in Malayalam on her harmonium!)

Pete Seeger's version of the classic Hindi bhajan Raghupate Raghava Raja Ram.

Battleground precincts

In the US presidential election, one often finds references to "battleground states": states with a fair chunk of electoral votes that are too close to call and could swing either Republican or Democrat. Likewise, in Patria there are a number of "battleground precincts".

Fredonia (9 seats): With only nine seats up for grabs, Patria's smallest precinct has the highest threshold percentage of votes required in order for parties to obtain seats in Congress. But it can often serve as a bellwether for the rest of Patria. Like the little town of Dixville Notch, New Hampshire, the little precinct of Fredonia is always the first to report its election returns.

Arboria (21 seats): Amma's adopted home precinct in Patria is not necessarily a slam-dunk for the Amrita Party.

Centralia (25 seats): SRM's "take back the economy" message will play well in the heart of Patria's de-industralized rust belt, amid the shuttered factories and offshored jobs.

Nova Columbia (36 seats): Like Centralia, also hit hard by the recession. A good stomping ground for both the National Union and SRM, with many unemployed voters going for the liberal Social Democrats.

Pottsylvania (13 seats): A maverick tradition of local fringe or nutbar parties that are virtually unknown in the rest of Patria winning a seat or two. Popular Front of Pottsylvania, anyone?

Caesarea (61 seats), Federal District of Castoropolis (38 seats): With a total of 99 seats between them, the capital and its surrounding precinct represent the biggest block of seats - almost one third of Patria's 333-seat Congress. Like New York state and California, Caesarea and FDC are the two biggest prizes for any party.

Flag Day in Patria

STAND UP FOR THE FLAG OF PATRIA!

January 25 is Robbie Burns Day in Scotland (scarf down that haggis and pour a few shots of Johnnie Walker!), and Flag Day in Patria. Although one of the first acts of the First Congress back in 1818 was to proclaim the simple red, white and blue tri-color Patria's official flag, on Jan. 25, 1973 the 39th Congress passed the Flag Act, setting the technical standards of the flag: 2:1 proportions, width of the white saltire (that's heraldic lingo for the X-shaped cross), as well as etiquette governing the proper handling and display of the flag. Since there had not been an official "flag day" in Patria (as in the USA on June 14), Congress also designated January 25 as such.

Unlike the US flag whose stars and stripes tell the story of the original 13 colonies and today's 50 states, or the Union Jack that smooshes together the crosses of England, Scotland and Northern Ireland, or the maple leaf front and centre in Canada's flag, there is no particular in-your-face symbolism in the flag of Patria. It is not a Jamaican flag with a patriotic color transplant. Any resemblance between Patria's flag and the house flag of Farrell Lines is purely coincidental.

As in the US election cycle, virtually all parties in the running for the 50th Congress will wrap themselves in the flag today and all along the campaign trail.

Parvati's funding campaign goes over the top

Honorary citizen of Patria Parvati Devi's crowdsourcing campaign to raise USD 6164 in order to shoot videos for her two songs "Shanti Om" and "Yoga in the Nightclub" has gone over the top! Thanks to donors in Canada, USA, UK, and around the world - including Patria - Parvati (like her on Facebook) has raised over $7800. This extra kick means that the videos will be even more amazing, with even more groovy costumes and professional production. As Parvati recently said in her blog:

By focusing unequivocally on my joy, I align myself with universal, divine will. As I say “YES!” with each breath to my deepest soul joy, my life becomes a living prayer. It is not up to me to then say, “I will make it happen.” That is the universe’s role. My job is simply to continually say yes, one moment after the next, and keep getting out of the way.

This successful fundraising campaign has been proof of this support. Parvati did not "make" it happen. It belongs to all of us, including Patria. The upcoming videos should go live in time to rock the 50th Congress Inauguration celebrations, if not before election day. Patria will be hearing a lot of "Shanti Om" on the Campaign 2014 trail even if National Unionists and the Diet Coke Party (Patria's version of the Tea Party) don't like it.

Campaign 2014: party like it's 2010

With 100 days to go until election day on April 19, the 2014 election campaign seems to be playing out like 2010 all over again. Virtually all of the parties are drawing on the same slogans, talking points, campaign promises and hot-button issues as at this time four years ago. The SRM is still playing the "Patria first/take back the economy" card along with the usual dose of old-school Hinduism. Tough-as-nails macho National Unionists still call for "law and order" and "separating the real men from the pussycats". The Amrita Party is all about "Embracing Patria" with four more years of Amma. The new-agey Chakra Party continues to "Inquire within" where there are "no gurus just right". Social Democrats are still "Patria's progressive voice". Greens are all for a "sustainable Patria". Libertarians are once again clamoring for "less government, more freedom". The Chastity Party and Family Values Party are once again two sides of the same "roll back the clock to the 1950s" coin. One of the few new slogans for 2014 comes from the Jungle Party: STRAIGHT FIRE! This is a reference to Jim Rome's take-no-prisoners approach to bare-knuckled hard-hitting sports talk and social commentary. But for the most part, even the Jungle's "have a take, don't suck" clones are talking the same smack as in 2010.

Over the next hundred days there is still the chance that a new party will enter the race: a fringe party that manages to win a seat or two, or a true grass-roots populist party that comes out of nowhere to win a fair chunk of seats. The last time that Patria experienced the latter was 20 years ago when the Patriot's Party (RAISE THE FLAG! RAISE YOUR FIST! RISE UP!) won 33 seats in the 45th Congress - almost 10% of popular vote in 1994 - but was virtually defunct by 2002.

Patria Post's 2013 Christmas stamp

Patria Post's traditional Christmas stamp was issued earlier this month. As with most Patrienish stamps, it is a "forever" stamp with no rupee denomination; the "1" simply represents the standard first-class rate. The cost of mailing a letter in Patria is expected to jump by a couple of rupees in early 2014. But the legislation authorizing the postal rate hikes is being filibustered in Congress and may not take effect before the pre-election recess in March.

Jail for johns campaign ramps up again

THEY BOUGHT SEX FROM PROSTITUTES!

While the Supreme Court of Canada struck down that country's anti-prostitution laws (prohibiting brothels, living off the avails of prostitution, etc.) in Patria the war against hookers is waged on another front: their customers or "johns". For many years, Patria has been publicly ridiculing these perverted losers who buy sex from prostitutes, shaming them on The John Show, one of the more popular programs on Doordarshan Ramrajya. Periodically a "Jail for Johns" campaign is launched, in which unsuspecting johns are arrested - often by policewomen disguised as prostitutes - summarily tried, convicted and sentenced to years of hard time. Five years in prison is not unusual as a minimum sentence, and even a life sentence for a third-time offender has been handed out under the "three strikes you're out" provision so beloved in much of Red-State America. In late 2013, bowing to re-election pressure from the National Union caucus (particularly in hard-core NU areas such as the suburbs of Castoropolis), yet another such campaign has been launched.

Ostensibly the "Jail for Johns" campaign attempts to put prostitutes out of business by taking their customers off the streets. But it also helps fill Patria's prisons and create jobs for guards, wardens and other correctional workers. Yes, there is a "Prison Industrial Complex" in Patria. But because so many Patrienish citizens have done so much yoga and absorbed so many teachings of non-violence, there are not enough murderers, rapists and other violent criminals behind bars to prevent prisons from being closed and guards getting pink-slipped. There is even a shortage of banksters and white-collar crooks. Someone has to make those Patrienish license plates.

As in Canada, prostitution is not illegal per se in Patria. But virtually everything relating to prostitution is. Patronizing prostitutes is not just a petty crime, but a felony that will send a lot of luckless men to the Big House when the National Union gets its law-and-order hands on the police blotters. BUY SEX, GO TO JAIL is now a popular slogan along with the usual election campaign hot air. #jailforjohns is another hashtag seen @Patriavotes2014.